Saturday, September 20, 2008

Growing

I often heard some sayings : People grow and learn from their mistakes. And then, I finally knew. I’ve made a big mistake. There’s no time for growing and learning anymore. It’s not just as easy as : I apologised and they forgave me, done. I notice that some mistakes couldn’t be forgiven. I had chances before. Thinking that i shall learnt my lessons. Now i realised i must aprreciate every chance that God has given me. I knew i deserved it. But i just wish that maybe it could be postponed? Ha. Nonsense. An innocent dude is eagerly popping up. And what can i do? There’s no time for struggle. I knew it but i’m still hesitating. What a shame on me.

I was once having a good future : I assumed that. However, what i have is not what i want. I thought that after my secondary graduation, then 1 year foundation course, after that 3 years degree in curtin would be a great plan for me. But i disappointed myself. And maybe my parents, friends, and bla. While maybe i should think. I’m not as certain anyway. Everyone is selfish and materialistic in this universe. When you’re wealthy you’re good, people admire you. Contrary, when you lost everything, people discriminate and mock you. People pretended goodness and kindness in front on me. Even my friends. I don’t have many true friends. And i could hardly trust human beings around me. I have been betrayed by my very best friends several times. For me, they come and go. They passed by my life, had some social intercourse, then became some strangers.

People approach me when they face problems and need help. Yet, when i need warmity, who would listen to me? I’m depressed.